Expectations

By Wei Jingrui(魏景瑞)

In between the grey clouds and the green hills,  a group of people is sitting in the truck's cargo compartment going through the 3 or 4 meters wide winding mountain road. Even when the visceras are completely upset, they are still singing with excitement. Gradually, in front of us appeared some adobe houses inserted in the mountains and some dark and simple Miao villagers. The mountain breeze came mixed with the smell of sheep and cattle, like telling us: "Pingtoushan welcomes you!"

Just in this first glance at the mountain, we can have a snapshot of the scenery on the road, pointing out all kinds of "unheard of", looking forward to the mountain world and to the mission that we are going to accomplish. However, before these glances, it is unavoidable to feel in our hearts the domination of these mountains.

From some other veterans of the Association, we understand the communication conditions in the mountains, the school's accomodation conditions, the level of knowledge of the villagers, and the strugles of the children.... the backwardness is a fact. It is the standard we have put to this mountain in our heart from the very beginning. At the same time as we have proudly prepared ourselves to face a hard life, in our hearts actually was stirred with mixed emotions from our natural superiority and well-intentioned sympathy. Honestly, from the very beginning, I did not mesaure up well this mountain.

After half a month, I can not really say what have I contributed to this place, what did I change in here. I can only reflect a little bit about how this mountain has changed me.

"Walking in the countryside's roads, an old cow is my companion..." While walking on the mountain's roads, I love on one hand sing this song, and on the other hand admire the distant peaks.彩云之南不负盛名,看天上的云时而零零星星在山顶上游走,时而披着霞光包围着夕阳,时而抽出些丝丝缕缕“掉”在山上。山有远处的绿,有近处的绿,还有脚底的黄。我一定永远都不会忘记和孩子们一起上山玩耍的那一天。他们负责跑来跳去摘各种野果野花送给我和另一个队员,,而我们俩负责仰望山间,接过他们的礼物,用相机抓拍每一个动人的瞬间。而当这一切被突如其来的瓢泼大雨打断的时候,我竟然狼狈得兴奋。大大小小的五六个孩子,光着脚走在泥泞的山路上,望着大雨中的远山,恍若梦境,灵魂急不可耐的要从躯体抽离融入这大自然中去。这里的山,这里的云,这里的漫天繁星,每一次仰望都让人沉静下来,心被这座朴实的山美到融化。

    这所道明小学,橘黄顶白墙的二层砖房基本坐落在这个村庄的最高处,孩子们每天早早的在大红铁门前等着开门。课上课下,我们这些老师俯视着他们或机灵或呆萌,或欢乐或愠怒,或渴求知识的眼睛,而我更喜欢蹲下身来,平等的,仰望孩子们的心灵,仰望他们像小太阳一样暖烘烘的笑脸。

    孩子中个子最高,辫子最长的女孩,安静得难以让人发现,而那深邃成熟的眼神不得不让人关注。记得心理课上我让他们写的小明星档案,在特长那一栏,她写的是“懂事”。没错,她的个头和脸上的成熟懂事让人难以相信她只有12岁的年纪。在山下的寄宿小学读书,假期回家每天做饭、放牛,我们的每一节课她都认真的听不会错过一分钟,只是下课时她还是坐在那里看书、背单词、整理笔记。教室里刻苦求知的她,教室外跳大绳打羽毛球的孩子群,我们看在眼里,心里有种说不出的滋味。站在学校操场的石桌上可以望见她的家,那天傍晚她坐在门前的山坡上的背影像是刻在了我的脑子里,到现在都挥之不去。

    独立,懂事,能干,大度,当然还有淘气,可爱,身手矫健,平头山的孩子会让我反省自己,小时候和现在。也许出身已经预置了他们与其他同龄人的差距,但好的品质终会让人脱颖而出,他们需要的只是一个契机。契机加上不懈的努力,就是奇迹喽。

    家访时了解到,这里的孩子普遍读完初中学业就画上了句号,但很多孩子心里都想读高中上大学,当医生当老师。我仰望现在淳朴可爱的他们,也想仰望将来走出山村有所成就的他们。我们希望孩子们能像仰望我们一样仰望未来的自己。

    仰望未来的自己,有一个不移的目标,从心底里相信自己。这座大山是孩子们厚重的根,也是他们要面临的挑战,对未来的期望比山更高希望就比云更高。每一个孩子,都是家庭和平头山村的希望。